One was small, hardly anything at all they are funny aren't they? lol, love it! A long time ago meaning | Common English Idioms #shorts. and now he sells honey, Whose dick was so long he could suck it. A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. Said she, But youre not in the right un.. Nell Rose (author) from England on August 19, 2010: Hi, pmc, lol glad you like them, I did have a few more, but they were, well a bit more rude! These funny limericks use their bouncy rhyme scheme to explore concepts like math, science, and philosophy, and the twisty, punny verses will get you thinkingand giggling! A forgetful old gasman named Dieter, / Who went poking around his gas heater, / Touched a leak with his light; / He blew out of sight / And, as everyone who knows anything about poetry can tell you, he also ruined the meter. Since the original use of the phrase, it underwent several changes and alterations into many versions. I wrote one recently that has gone missing, and I wish I could find it. . Its a common limerick, and many people know it and use it hundreds of years later. There are dozens of examples of rhyming the last word in the limerick. Who rushed through a field of blue Clover. School bus carrying 40 children plunges into creek in French Alps, Ian Wright says he loves Arsenal hero Reiss Nelson as he celebrates epic Bournemouth victory, He can do everything Michael Dawson blown away by Lisandro Martinez as Jeff Stelling rates Man Utd defender, Why VAR didnt award penalty to Arsenal for handball during Bournemouth clash, Man with MS so severe he cannot cut up his own food classed as fit to work, A boy wrote a poem about living with Aspergers and it will break your heart a little, World Poetry Day 2016: The best spring and Easter poems to celebrate poetry day, Do not sell or share my personal information. lol thanks nell. the world nutty. There was a young fellow from Belfast / That I wanted so badly to tell fast / Not to climb up the stair / As the top step was air / And thats why the young fellow fell fast. For he told a fat girl she was skinny! With him were real cruel; you cant duck it. Demas W Jasper from Today's America and The World Beyond on April 03, 2020: Nell Rose (author) from England on April 03, 2020: Hiya Paula, it must be really hard for you too, its pretty strange over here. "There once was a man . Let's say you were trapped inside this room. A magazine writer named Bing / Could make copy from most anything; / But the copy he wrote / of a ten-dollar note / Was so good he now lives in Sing Sing. Your limericks are humorous and smart and just the right amount of naughty. and thanks, nell. The star violinist was bowing; / The quarrelsome oarsmen were rowing. Let's start with a few basics. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. At the local museum Thanks for the laughs. Luv Ya! Your email address will not be published. Some believe that limericks were originally made to be naughty. well, I wish! Thank You. thanks for reading, nell. Nell Rose (author) from England on February 17, 2017: LOL! and you can stop blushing now! glad it made you laugh! There once was a man from Nantucket . There once was a girl in Milan, New fashions she liked to put on. Nell Rose (author) from England on March 16, 2011: Hi, jamiecoins, thanks for the comment, glad you liked it, cheers nell. The specific origin of the limerick is unknown, likely spoken between ancestral friends long before ever being written down. Man From Nantucket Lyrics There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it. There once was a man from . You may recall learning about limericks (or even writing a few of your own) in grade school. / Not until its been baked, boiled, or fried. There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. / Said the two to the tutor, / Is it harder to toot, or / To tutor two tooters to toot?, A rather disgruntled young Viking / Found plunder was not to his liking / When they yelled All ashore, / He just threw down his oar / And announced, Im not striking, Im striking!. Id say you can bet your Assonet! These are Guaranteed to Make You Smile. 7 Of The Best Funny Limericks - ChuckleBuzz There once was a man from Madras Whose balls - Freebsd Limericks: 369 - 378 and took the motto of Philli, "limericks can be traced back in history", but noting for me, cause i'd piss a streak, as in 'limericks' not so naughty, i know, my might and arms are night sticks, they glow. Kevin Foley , Vienna, Austria, A birdwatching Brit. A few years ago, Yesterdays Island began to encourage readers to continue the saga. Your email address will not be published. There once was a man from Nantucket . And cut off his meat and two veg! These are so funny. Like a short skirt, She used it to flirt, With all the men who were not eunuchs. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There once was a man from Racine who'd invented a fucking machine. Ran away with a man. There once was a man From Nantucket who was not In a limerick. A flea and a fly in a flue / Were imprisoned, so what could they do? Whose balls were made of brass Nell Rose (author) from England on March 09, 2012: Thanks Lee, really funny! It took a lot of searching all over the place, but I love them, don't you? Nell Rose (author) from England on October 28, 2011: Bella DonnaDonna from New Orleans, LA on October 28, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on October 20, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on October 18, 2011: Cresentmoon2007 from Caledonia, MI on October 18, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on September 28, 2011: Hi, Shaisty, lol Brilliant! To West Virginia she went, Nell Rose (author) from England on May 29, 2014: Hi Vellur, lol! And quick as a mouse, Nell Rose (author) from England on August 18, 2010: Hi, Ivorwen, ha ha that's great, I love limericks we have always made up some at home, and I was in a funny mood! Freebsd Limericks: 370 of 860. Yep, its awhole bunch of limericks thatll have you clicking to shrink your browser. boyfriend and he was wearing a his College T-Shi. Jokes - Dirty, Funny, Punny and all | Austin - Yelp The limerick has a rhyming structure. There once was a girl from Nantucket is the first line from a limerick about a girl who couldnt pay her fare, so she provided a sexual favour instead. Joshua Zubricki, Gloucester, MA, Nan took the cash to Nantasket It was winter, alas. The Best Limericks of All Time: Examples, Definition, History, Ogden This town is one of the settings from the famous book Moby Dick, and in the 19th century, it was the whaling capital of the world. There once was a man from nantucket(nsfw) : r/Jokes - reddit I found this extremely entertaining, thanks for the laughs. Who was doing his wife on the stair The Princeton Tiger by Prof. Dayton Voorhees shows us the following. For more feathery plays on words, try some of these bird puns that will quack you up. And said Jewels, Dad, tell me where you stuck it. And he said to the man, There once was a girl from Nantucket, This particular limerick became popular blue comedy in 1902 when it was first published by Prof. Dayton Voorhees in Princeton Tiger. There was a lewd whore from Nantucket who intended to pee in a bucket; but being a man she missed the damn can and her rattled johns fled, crying: "Fuck it!" Variation on a classic limerick by Michael R. Burch Here's another bawdy Nantucket limerick, author unknown: There once was a man from Nantucket Whose schlong was so long he could sucket As a result, using the explicit and misogynistic versions of the limerick on social platforms could land you in a lot of trouble with the woke mob. And now there's little Franky. All shades of the spectrum, I've built a little API-as-a-Service platform that makes it easy to create an API and deploy it to a private cloud. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 02, 2011: Hi, vietnamvet, thanks so much, glad you liked them, cheers nell. You'll use the phrase in public, typically in an X-rated format, to tell someone that you don't care about what they are saying or a task you are doing. PDF Dirty Jokes, Tasteless, Jokes, Ethnic Jokes - University of Central Report as inappropriate 11/26/2017 This Yelper's account has been closed. They are funny, but they can be a good lullabye. All combined it adds up to all the great content you see! There was no need for your man to jack it. There once was a man from Nantucket - YouTube Rating: 3 /5 (3 Votes) or Email Friend I love this.. made me laugh I really enjoyed. ha ha. After a little fumbling around we came up with, well, these. So there you have it, mixing the English drunkards with the poetic Irish, we ended up with the mixture of Limerick that we know so well today! could do more, but a bit risque'! [5] [6] Among the best-known are: But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; I actually put this one on my answering machine many years ago. Did she think on that bucket There once was a man from Nantucket,Whose dick was so long he could suck it.He said with a grin,As he wiped off his chin,"If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it.". Box 626, Nantucket, MA 02554, or email your limerick. That the street door was partially closed. The word Limerick comes from the town in Ireland called, well, Limerick! Along came his wife, It's a story of a blessed man and his carefree attitude to life. Who had one so long he could suck it. There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. Who kept all his cash in a bucket. Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, He utterly lacked, The opening line is so well known that it has been used as a stand-alone joke . There was a man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it! Princeton Tiger But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; And he said to the man, He was welcome to Nan, But as for the bucket, Pawtucket. Princeton Tiger, But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, lol thanks so much nell. Madeline Begun Kane aka Mad Kane Trump the Game Plan by Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition" There once was a huckster named Trump who liked to be kissed on the rump. There was a young lady whose chin / Resembled the point of a pin / So she had it made sharp / And purchased a harp / And played several tunes with her chin. The limerick is a humorous five-line poem with two rhymes: one shared by the first, second, and fifth lines, and the other shared by the shorter third and fourth lines. There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket Nan took it! sorry it took so long to answer, I seem to be running around like a mad woman these last few days! There was a young lady from Munich, Who wore a very short tunic. He couldnt even go lamp-post pissing! After about 15 minutes, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The limericksBelow are 3 of the most well-known versions of the limerick, starting with the original dirty one. These 'adult' poems for Limerick Day are totally NSFW - Metro I can always count on you, Nell! Box 626, Nantucket, MA 02554, or email your limerick. thanks again, nell. Clayton Commons of Rhode Island, On reading of Nan and Paws bucket document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Such that Nan and her mate Which of course is all of you! Exchange, Of this story we hear from Nantucket, There once was a girl named Irene / Who lived on distilled kerosene / But she started absorbing / A new hydrocarbon / And since then has never benzene. glad it made you laugh, thanks! When the owner saw Pa So, as I was in a particularly funny mood, I thought that I would add a few of my favourites here. Ran away with a man, It's based upon a poem about a man who was blessed. Nell Rose (author) from England on August 22, 2010: Hi, raisingme, I was going to get ruder then I thought better of it! See answer (1) Copy. But the money he earned, Mantucket There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it To save a lot of trouble He put it in double But instead of cumming, he went! Nell Rose (author) from England on March 13, 2017: Thanks Shyron, I used to do them a lot, but not recently. Hed both seen and heard; I am glad you liked it, we are always making up Limericks in my house! and the doctor says "well how did it get there" and she says "I was doing my Ah Ha. I need a front door for my hall, Here's a Limerick that I heard in college from a music major. But twas not the Almighty A wonderful bird is the pelican / His bill holds more than his belican / He can take in his beak / Enough food for a week / But Im damned if I see how the helican. Just what I needed to perk me up and make me smile. The protagonist in the obscene versions is typically portrayed as well-endowed and hypersexualized. lol glad you liked it, cheers nell. But Nan and the man There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all his cash in a bucket. " There once was a man from Nantucket " is the first line in many limericks. lol glad you liked it, I was just in a funny mood! Thanks Lizzy! / For he said, As a rule, / When the weather turns cool, / I invariably get in a stew.. jamiecoins from ireland on March 15, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on February 01, 2011: Hi, NLL, glad you liked it! Copyright 1999-2023 Ahmad Anvari. thanks for reading, and I love the limerick! 43 Old and Funny Dirty Limericks! - Best Jokes And Puns on Nantucket, Nell Rose (author) from England on September 01, 2011: Hi, suzette, thanks! thanks so much for reading, cheers nell. In stormy weather Liz Elias from Oakley, CA on February 17, 2017: ROFL! 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. Suzette Walker from Taos, NM on September 01, 2011: These are great! Quite a few of these were new to me. There was a young maid from Madras He bent it in double, Chicago Tribune, Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset, Limerick Challenge: "There Once Was a Man from Nantucket" Which is situated in the southern part of the country. Twitter Trolls Ted Cruz for Naughty Limerick Directed at Biden - Newsweek A wonderful bird is the pelican; His beak can hold more than his belican. To claim it by law Another mocked, "Tucker is already talking to the guy about a documentary." Another broke into poetry, tweeting, "There once was a man from nantucket. lol If I could stay in bed all day and just write, then I think I would be happy! Crystal Tatum from Georgia on March 17, 2014: These are a lot of fun! Thanks to those who have contributed theirs, more are always welcome a they are very good. This is my first time to hear about limericks. And I had never heard a one of these before. I just made it up when posting. However, I did not know about its root. His towel froze to the grass, and his foot locked in ice where he'd stuck it. And I fell for that man from Nantucket. How to spell the potato has tried / Many minds, sometimes mine, Ill confide. Deborah Brooks Langford from Brownsville,TX on January 03, 2013: Nell my friend.. / You never can tell till you try., A tutor who tooted a flute / Tried to teach two young tooters to toot. But the banister broke There once was a girl from Hoboken, who swore her cherry was broken, from riding her bike, on a cobblestone pike, but it was really broken from pokin'. In my limerick hubs I always had some problem getting them past the HP censors and had to change a few. I will have to remember that one! 4 nominal limericks. There once was a girl named Louise Who | by Peter I had to hit all your buttons because they are "all that". 469 0 obj <> endobj We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! And if you want to stump them while youre at it, give them a few of these hard riddles to test their smarts. Click to expand. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were . Whether this is true or not, they have certainly been vulgarised today. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 11, 2012: Hi Sue, lol! There once was a man from Nantucket, Princeton Tiger. Nantucket Jokes - Joke Buddha Cruz's Attempted 'Nantucket' Limerick for Biden Backfires on Twitter "There once was a man from Nantucket" is the opening line for many limericks, in which the name of the island of Nantucket creates often ribald rhymes and puns. A strange young fellow from Leeds All three of the A lines must rhyme with each other, and the two B lines must also rhyme with each other. -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make Nell Rose (author) from England on May 11, 2020: Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on May 10, 2020: A nice collection. Grabbed the bucket and ran, dont Juneau. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. There Once was a Girl from Nantucket - Meaning, Origin and Usage Bonnie Mitchell, White Plains, NY, The lawyer they hired, Dan Schuckat, There once was a girl in the choir / Whose voice rose up hoir and hoir, / Till it reached such a height / It went clear out of seight, / And they found it next day in the spoir. In stormy weather, If youre a history buff, youll get a kick out of these history jokes. rd.com, Getty Images A writer named. Did you know Lear was also a brilliant artist? So she pulled up her dress and said f*uck it! Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call of Duty: Warzone Path of Exile Hollow Knight: Silksong Escape from Tarkov Watch Dogs: Legion. And as for the bucket, Nantucket! / Though it may have an eye, / Theres no E dont ask why! Who went for a ride in a rocket If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Send us your limericks viahey@metro.co.uk or Tweet us on Twitter @MetroUK and well dd them in. Princeton Tiger But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; And he said to the man, He was welcome to Nan, But as for the bucket, Pawtucket. Nell Rose (author) from England on December 22, 2010: Hi, Docmo, ha ha glad you liked it, and thanks nell. ** There once was a man from Nantucket, Who's dick was so long he could suck it, He ran down the street, Dragging his meat, He carried his balls a in bucket There you go There once was a lady from Venus Who's body was shaped like a penis When First Contact was made The crew were dismayed When she told them her species and genus Whoa, did you just write that now? Dirty Limericks - Straight Dope Message Board This inspired numerous sequels, the most distinguished of which are believed to be the following, from the Chicago Tribune and the New York Press, respectively: Pa followed the pair to Pawtucket. Confused? And as for the bucket, Nantucket. He promised awed voters if they'd be his promoters, If youd like a nice pearl Funny Jokes; Top Rated; Most Discussed. There was a young fellow of Crete / Who was so exceedingly neat / When he got out of bed / He stood on his head / To make sure of not soiling his feet. Math not your thing? Who kept all his cash in a bucket. Great tufts of fine grass If you will just roll over, The cash and the bucket, Pawtucket. Hilarious Gavin & Stacey Quotes And Funny Catchphrases! I am glad you liked it! Interestingly enough, I find the first batch of limericks a lot more entertaining than Lear's may I open my eye now?? / It seems theyve been trying forever / To find x, y, and z / And its quite clear to me: / If theyve not found them yet then theyll never. lol! 507 0 obj <>stream Flowed out of his rectum, There once was an artist named Saint, Nell Rose (author) from England on February 01, 2012: Thanks Vinaya, they are the one thing that always makes people smile when they hear them! Anyway, off we go, and if anybody has got any good ones, please feel free to add them at the bottom. The man and the girl with the bucket; And finished her off in mid-air. Continue with Recommended Cookies. And practically useless on dates. Voted up and across and thanks for the entertainment. There once was a man from madras When they clanged together, They played "Stormy Weather", And lightning shot out of his ass. They asked for a fare, yep I know the one WP! well when you put it like that Perspycacious! If you like mysteries, psychic phenomena, true stories or just a good laugh, please feel free to click on my Profile page, the link is below, it would be great to see you. However, the limerick is the common mans version of poetry. Limericks are always good, racy fun. The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!". Said he, Sneak in the house, There once was a man from Nantucket - Wikipedia But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; ----- There once was a . There was a young man from Brighton I really enjoyed your hub, thank you for sharing. Who had a magnificent ass; There once was a runner named Dwight / Who could speed even faster than light. Cruz responded by reciting the opening line of an infamous dirty limerick that utilizes certain phrases which rhyme with "Nantucket." Earlier this year, as Cruz's state of Texas faced devastating winter storms that decimated its independent power grid, the Senator flew to sunny Cancn, Mexico as hundreds of his constituents froze to death. These are a bit saucy and not safe for kids, just the way it should be on this website! Demas W Jasper from Today's America and The World Beyond on October 22, 2015: (Others elsewhere.) A relative way, get it? As he wiped off his chin, if my mouth was a cunt I could fuck it. This is usually because the word "Nantucket" is easy to rhyme with. Peter Chubb, Aldeburgh, Suffolk, England, Pa went back to Nantucket, There once was a man from Nantucket : r/Jokes - Reddit 490 0 obj <>/Filter/FlateDecode/ID[<8AF3270EBB3E184A91C3DFB6F9A888EE><1D479E6B4C6B4345AB21D263EB0D7E10>]/Index[469 39]/Info 468 0 R/Length 102/Prev 189081/Root 470 0 R/Size 508/Type/XRef/W[1 3 1]>>stream If its money you need, I dont lack it. Whose Rod was so long it bent. lol! Ivorwen from Hither and Yonder on August 18, 2010: These are so funny! cheers nell. thanks for reading, I am having trouble with my pc at the moment and have also been busy with my brother, I just can't get on here enough these days, but thats gonna change! There once was a man from Nantucket - Wikipedia Republished // WIKI 2 And the cash that it held caused a row, Two Tears in a Bucket Meaning, Usage and Origin, How to Write an Ode (with Tips & Examples), How to Write in Iambic Pentameter (with Tips & Examples), How to Write a Clear Theme Statement (with Examples), Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick Meaning, Origin and Usage, We Are Not Amused Meaning, Origin and Usage. Manage Settings An oyster from Kalamazoo / Confessed he was feeling quite blue. Amazing Funny Facts and Crazy Statistics! *sighs* Not even a bar-room poet. hb```Y@($$t`SSW%)l+2^`S q[Gty3gfx|:\,goqRW$VP e0x>G9?\d(p7GvB @W >` @d Ip(#uvfia QAA91uG2`\h.l% {]}_4-Ph0 aD 0 Gfc He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it! Her boyfriend was about to up-chuck it. What is the original "There once was a man from Nantucket" joke? He said with a grin, while wiping his chin. Advertisement Coins. these are funny! :-) They are so fun to read, but also fun to write. Great treat to read them. Nell Rose (author) from England on March 17, 2014: Hi Crystal, lol! Nell Rose (author) from England on April 02, 2020: Sankhajit Bhattacharjee from MILWAUKEE on April 01, 2020: Nell Rose (author) from England on July 09, 2017: LOL! Usually, you rhyme the limerick with other similar explicit words. This series of limericks first appeared in a June 14, 1924 edition of a Nantucket newspaper. All Rights Reserved. There once was a girl from Nantucket. kind of witty but you know what people expect when they anticipate a limmerick. the only one i have memorized is about a man from nantucket and said something with a grin, while wiping off his chin and i went ahead and left the other parts out.
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